Being happy with someone that has been a friend for the past five months and that is becoming more as the days go by is worth the risk I’m taking. A person that was once a complete stranger to me has become someone so significant in my life in the span of a few months. It all started with a few drunken encounters and that was all it took us to begin developing a relationship rather than being acquaintances for the rest of our lives. The drunken encounters led to some casual conversations that gradually grew to be more personal. Soon enough a friendship that was once so casual became something more and something else that made us happy. Now it’s something else that makes us happy to be where we are with who we were there with. No thoughts or intentions of a friendship being anything more but through friendship, we all can catch feelings. I’m thankful to have a friendship with someone that is such a good person in general, not just to me. Waking up in a world where I am always looking forward to where this will take me is still something I’m getting used to but I’m okay with that. Everything has been surreal; I never saw it coming that I would be as happy as I am with the person that I have by me but I am thankful for them and everything so far.
I have become used to putting up walls from people to protect myself the past few years that it became what I am accustomed to doing. Only so many get through the walls I put up and stay in my life, and that’s what makes me selective of who I let in. I don’t want anyone in my life that’s only going to be a part of my life temporarily; it’s not fair to me that they come into my life and leave when convenient to them. I want people in my life that will stay even if things unravel for the better and the worse. I am surrounding myself with all the right people that make me happy. This time I won’t run from a good thing because I’m scared to get hurt. I am not going to run from someone who has been nothing but a good thing in my life, because I’m getting too comfortable or attached. I would rather be happy and have the good times now and deal with the potential heart break in the future than regret that I never stayed to see where I could be with someone because I was scared. I may be in fear but I’m going to give the benefit of the doubt because I have a good gut feeling about everything. The future I once feared has become the mysterious and alluring future I want. No more running, no more hiding in fear, I’m going to let everything be and continue to be happy. Here I am, happy again and thankful to have someone around me that has brought out the best me and is making me a better me by showing me everything I once saw in someone else but with more to offer while opening my eyes to a happier day every day.
If I love you, I love you; don’t ask me questions and don’t question it. Just let it be. Just let me love you, don’t make it hard to love you when it’s easy to love you and all I want to do.
If you see someone in your future, don’t just tell them, put them in your future before they don’t want a future with you in it. It’s a first come, first serve basis.
Don’t ask for a future from someone when you are already a part of their past. You can’t expect someone to give you another shot, sometimes it happens but often times it doesn’t because you have ruined things or the other person has realized it is better without you in their present and future.
It was like a game of Monopoly between us. We went about our lives doing what we did on our own and we eventually crossed paths then at some point we landed upon a chance. We first landed about a chance to develop a friendship, which we took and developed to be one that’s the foundation to our lives. Later down the line we landed on a chance at something more than a friendship, a chance I gave you to be specific. This chance was yours for almost a year and I feel that it may have passed its expiry date. You are going to remain one of my best friends nonetheless. You are one of the most amazing people to me that can treat me the best and give me the world on a plate but that’s all it will be, I’m starting to see that. We stopped to collect our things before we landed upon the “go!” of what was next and we ended the game there. No more games. You will always be my friend no matter what, and after all, you did watch me grow up and take care of me these past six years. Thank you for everything, I will still say that I am thankful and blessed for everything with you. I’m still here for you and I will always try but things are going to change.
